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Writer's pictureSylvia Gonsahn-Bollie

Embrace Self-Love



Contentment isn't complacency.

Is it possible to be happy with your present while striving for a better future?

Can you genuinely love yourself today while you work on optimizing your wellness?


Too often, contentment is miscategorized as complacency. In other words to the only way to achieve is to be unhappy with

🙇🏾‍♀️Who you are

🙇🏾‍♀️What you have

🙇🏾‍♀️How you look

👏🏽This 👏🏽is 👏🏽a 👏🏽lie.

In fact, I've found embracing who you are and loving yourself now is the strongest foundation for wellness and weight changes that last.

It's time to love yourself today,

not when

🚫Your jeans fit "right"

🚫Your face slims up

🚫They do a double-take when you walk by

All that may matter to you.

☝🏾But those are just temporary "wins"

For 2021 to be your year, optimize your wellness for the rest of your life. Its results are not the core of who you are, or this year you don't need a 🆕 you.

It's time to Embrace You & optimize yourself.

How can you do that and still love yourself?

Choose to E.M.B.R.A.C.E. Yourself in the following seven steps.

💜Examine limiting beliefs. Write down negative thoughts.

💜Match each negative thought with a positive one about yourself.

💜Buy clothes that look good on your current body.

💜Release clothes, people, and places that no longer fit.

💜Affirm yourself daily using the list of positive thoughts you made.

💜Celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how "small."

💜Enjoy the present; it's your gift. 2020 taught us today is all that's promised. Enjoy it.


Let's discuss each step in a little more detail.


💜Examine limiting beliefs. Write down negative thoughts.

Negative thoughts weigh us down by preventing positive change.

During the Sunday #WeeklyEmbrace Facebook Live on Dr. Sylvia Gonsahn-Bollie, MD page, someone asked, "How can you distinguish 'truth' from a negative thought on your weight journey?" Specifically, she was referring to the thought, "I'm so fat."

My response was it depends on how that thought makes you feel and what action it promotes. Since your happy weight is deeply personal, no one can determine that for you. Therefore the only "truth" that matters regarding your happy weight is how you feel about it.

-Does your thought make you feel happy?

-Does it promote positive, loving actions towards yourself?

If not it's a negative thought and time to replace it with a more helpful one.

💜Match each negative thought with a positive thought about yourself

For this, I recommend you match a physical thought with a physical thought. In the Embrace You Weight & Wellness program, I encourage participants to complement themselves daily. Usually, people choose non-physical compliments like "I am nice" or "I'm a good mom." While these are positive thoughts, they don't get to the core of our dislike of our physical features. Think about when you are dating someone. Do you focus on their physical flaws? Even if you are aware of them, you choose to focus on the positive because you're so enamored with that person. Try dating yourself again. Focus on the features you like about yourself rather than those you don't.

💜Buy clothes that look good on your current body.

Do you have clothes that you're holding onto to wear 'one day when I lose weight'?

Did you rock the latest fashion in the past, but since you gained weight, you just "throw something on"?

When was the last time you told yourself, "I can't wear that till I lose weight?"

Has this helped you lose weight any faster? If you're like I was, probably not.

It may seem simple, but our clothing affects our self-esteem.

Really how do the thoughts above make you feel about your body?

You're current body is just as deserving of adornment as your future body.

So please:

Donate those clothes that don't fit. It's not wasteful. Someone will enjoy them, and you'll get a tax break.

Buy an outfit that makes you feel fierce and confident.

Wear "that outfit" now...

Have you been adorning the your current body or waiting until you lose weight? What change are you going to make today?


💜Release clothes, people, places, or anything that no longer fits.

Is it easy for you to release [insert here]?

Releasing was a tough one for me because I was raised not to be "wasteful," especially with material things.

That translated to

-Cleaning my plate because "people were starving."

-Keeping clothes for a long time even if they didn't fit because "I'll fit them one day."


As I've matured, I realize I applied this principle to other areas of my life as well:

-by holding onto friendships that were no longer healthy

-staying at a high-stress job that eroded my wellness

I've learned the hard way that letting go creates lasting wellness through:

-Joy that comes giving when we donate items to others

-Freeing us of negative people and places

-Space in our lives for positive relationships to flourish

So what are you holding onto? It's time to release and grow.


💜Affirm yourself daily using the list of positive thoughts you made.

What do you say to yourself regularly?

Words are so powerful.

To create lasting positive change in your life, it's time to stop saying negative things about yourself.

Remember that list of positive thoughts from Day 2? Let's transform them into positive affirmations. Write your list down, post them in a visible place, and say them daily.

Examples of positive affirmations for lasting wellness are:

-I am making progress each day.

-I love my body.

-My body is on my side.

-I can lose weight.

-I can still improve my health.


What's your positive affirmation for lasting wellness and weight loss?


💜Celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how "small."

Do you celebrate all your wins along the way?

Or

Do you think your celebration has to wait until…..

-You wear a specific size?

-The scale says a specific number?

Waiting to celebrate feels like holding your breath and trying to breathe at the same time.

The negative mindset tells you, "You haven't done anything yet."

Every victoryregardless of its sizedeserves celebration because no win is easy.

It takes effort.

Your efforts are worth recognition and honor.

Choosing to celebrate your early victories doesn't take away from your final victory. It enhances it.

What a "small" accomplishment you choose to celebrate today?


💜Enjoy the present; it's your gift.

Are you focused on the past or the future?

Goals are important, but if we're only fixated on the end, we can miss the joy of the journey.

2020 taught us today is all that's promised. Today (and from now on), choose to make time to enjoy your journey.

It takes being intentional about:

-slowing down to pause

-showing gratitude for the "small" and "big" things

-seeing beauty in the moment

When was the last time you took a moment to Enjoy the Present? Pause & enjoy.

--


How are you going to E.M.B.R.A.C.E. Self-Love in 2021 to optimize your wellness?


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